There are times when the world seems to be pushing itself upon us, pulling us in different directions, and making every step we take painful, rushed, and stressful. All we seem to hear is “I need you to…”; “You can’t…”; and “Why would you…”
Just reading a paragraph like that can make some people start to cringe. So we would like to go over some easy and quick ways to help you keep your cool and stay stress free in relationships. You control you. No one else can control your feelings, only you can. Likewise you cannot control other people’s feelings. It sounds simple but it is hard to do sometimes.
Always remember that you are in control of you. Even when everything else is going mad around you, you don’t have to let it affect you. When a doctor, nurse, manager, or patient is rude, it doesn’t mean you have to be. It does not mean you have to be in a bad mood and you do not need to dwell on it. It is up to you to let it go and be in control of you.
Keep to the facts. That is very important, especially when it comes to confrontation. “She never liked me” is more of an opinion than a fact. Think of it more as “She does not look at things the same way I do.” “Nothing is good enough for him” might be better thought of as “He only wants us to be our best.”
Judgments are hard to resist and they will show. If you go into any conversation thinking it is going to be a battle or a confrontation, your body language will show it. Go in with a clear mind and be open that you don’t know where the conversation will go and you don’t know what the answers will be. It will make you more calm and better at getting to a resolution.
Here are a couple of things to think about when you feel like your emotions are getting the best of you and stressing you out:
- I have overcome worse.
- This special person to me would be proud to see how I just let that go.
- They are having a bad day; I am not.
- Focus on one little thing in the room that brings you joy – a picture, a color, a cloud outside. Find anything to appreciate the moment you are in.
Controlling you and your stress takes practice. Enjoy your victories! Practice with small things. When driving, give yourself extra time and take your time driving somewhere. Stay calm during delays and patient with other drivers. Starting with the little things in life will help you with bigger, more stressful situations down the road.
Stay positive, control you, and life should be better with less stress!
Patrick Vondra is an Account Manager with the Imaging division of Aureus Medical Group.